i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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