theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
