if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
