good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
