I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Randomize
