i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
