Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house