two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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