Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
In other news, I just burned my penis
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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