there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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