i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize