I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
