Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
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