? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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