Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
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Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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