That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
