I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Randomize