May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize
