they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
