So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize