ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
