I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
