sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
her vagine was all disorganized.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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