no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
