please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
