a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
