Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
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