Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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