you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
