I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
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