Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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