but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize