We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
