the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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