my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize