I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
