dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
