what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Randomize
