My brain says no but my pants say off.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
