Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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