in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
