yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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