I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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