Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
