hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
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