I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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