Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
