I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
