new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
