you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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