No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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